Truck shopping, ugh

We are in the market for a new vehicle. Well, not "new", cuz the one we want would be about forty grand, but "new to us" with all the bells n' whistles that we need. Ya see, we have this clapped out '97 Suburban that is on it's very last legs...or cylinders...or whatever.

We LOVE our Burb! It has been the greatest vehicle we've ever had. We've hauled everything from Joe's motorcycles to a ton of pellets in that thing, not to mention a million trips with stinky kids, dogs, gas cans, tools, lumber, and a few hundred bags of rotting McDonald's scraps. The super cool thing about the Burb is that it's soooo roomy that you don't discover those McD's bags until they form legs and crawl out from whatever crack they were crammed into. But the ol' Titanic is just a few bolts away from falling apart in the middle of I-5 (perchance we've abused it a tad too much?) so we are in that "sell it now before it dies" phase... Sad to part with it.

Anyhoo, to make matters worse, as much as I would love a shiny new Suburban I'm afraid we need something different. You must understand, we currently have TEN motorized gadgets. Yep, I said TEN. Actually FOURTEEN if you count the pressure washer, riding lawnmower and two push mowers. That is waaaaayyyyy too many things to break, tweak, pour gas into and maintain. (If Julie Carlson is reading this she is probably laughing and saying "Pshaw, that ain't NOTHIN!). Well here's our meager list, from oldest to youngest:

1. '70ish Allis Chalmers Tractor-- "Allis"
2. '90 Class-A motorhome --"Princess Palace"... why yes, it does have pink carpeting!
3. '94 Yamaha YZ80 dirtbike-- "the 80"
4. '97 Chevy Suburban --"Titanic"
5. '98 Ford Ranger--"Anger"
6. '98 Honda Accord Coupe--"Penelope Pitstop or the Hot Rod"
7. '05 Yamaha YZ105 dirtbike--"Screamer"
8. '05 Yamaha YZ125 dirtbike--"Baller"
9. '06 Yamaha YZ85 dirtbike--"Rocket"
10. '06 Yamaha TTR125 dirtbike--"Yamahottie"

And of course the aforementioned farm implements.

My bill at the DMV was about $500 bucks last year. At least I can write it all off. I am seriously considering dropping a cigarette in one of the oil soaked corners of my garage and waiting to collect the insurance money. Knowing my luck the house would catch on fire and I'd be living in a half melted 28 foot RV with my husband, two dogs, a cat and a couple of very disgruntled kids.

Here's my point (I do kinda have one). We need to downsize. And by downsize I mean take out a whopper of a loan and buy a couple more pieces to add to our menagerie. Follow me here; if we sell the RV and the Suburban, we will eliminate one very large gas guzzling engine and one on-it's-last-legs vehicle. In exchange we will acquire one shiny newish 3/4 ton truck, a lovely NON-MOTORIZED camper to go on top, and a large NON-MOTORIZED enclosed motorcycle/cargo trailer to follow along behind. I think its a great plan. Now if I can just find a bank stupid enough to lend us more money for more toys....